Room to breathe

In last month’s article, I talked about the poet Mary Oliver’s question, “What are you going to do with your one wild and precious life?”

I decided pretty early on in my life that my wild and precious life would always include writing. It’s how I ended up writing several novels and novellas while in high school, compiling several poetry collections, writing sporadic blogs and becoming a consistent contributor and editor for my college’s student newspaper. It’s how I ended up helping launch and continue Sunrise, though my role has shifted over time. 

The chant of “wild and precious” echoed in my mind as I pitched the idea for The Breathing Room column. When I wrote articles for my college’s student newspaper, I often became overwhelmed with all the bad in the world and wanted to see more space held for the beautiful things in life. I wanted my column to be a place where people from all walks of life could read and know that they are safe and welcome, exactly as they are.

We all need a physical space where we can let down our guard and know we won’t be taken advantage of emotionally. The Breathing Room is here to provide a sort of digital safe space where you know that you might be challenged to consider life from a different perspective, but you will never be attacked, ridiculed or pushed into anything. That’s one reason why it will always be free to access. That’s also why I always focus on topics that affect everyone, like mental health, friendships, grief and life changes.

In this way, I write The Breathing Room for me. Perhaps it is selfish, but I enjoy having to focus on the good and writing this column requires me to put aside my fears and distractions so I can write about hope, peace, creativity, inspiration and the love that can permeate every walk of life. I hope The Breathing Room has been a respite for you and will continue to be so in the coming articles.

The Breathing Room is designed to be a space where you know you can relax for a moment or two, take a deep breath and be rejuvenated for the work ahead. You’ll see other articles from me, whether news, lifestyles or opinion, and it may be clear that you and I disagree on things or that we view the world through very different lenses. In The Breathing Room, we don’t have to worry about any of that. Here, we’re just two people, making our way through the world the best way we know how.

We live in a society where being tired is a badge of honor, where the fewest hours of sleep wins the water cooler conversation, where slowing down is seen as a waste of time. I hope you remember that isn’t true. We have work to do, yes, to make our society the most just and equitable it can be, and to keep ourselves and our families housed and fed. But when society wants us to believe that productivity is how we measure our self-worth, it is revolutionary to take a step back and rest. We can’t make change if we’re exhausted. Rest is part of the work. 

I hope that you carve out your own breathing room, that you dedicate time and energy into creating a place, both physical and mental, where you can let down your guard and just be. Perhaps it’s a room in your house or a chair in your apartment where only you can go, a blanket you can use to visualize wrapping around yourself to keep the demands of the world at bay, a park where you can breathe in fresh air, a song that moves your feet and heart or a journal no one else can read. Wherever you find respite, lean into it. Don’t use it as a reward when you’ve accomplished something. Peace is not something you have to earn.

When we learn to rest and rejuvenate, we give ourselves the love we so willingly give others. And we give those in our lives permission to take care of themselves, too, by setting an example. Little by little, our impact ripples out, and before we know it, having room to breathe will be natural again, and it will be easy to remember that our lives truly are wild and precious. 

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